Modern Girl

I'm nocturnal.
I hate that I have to be quiet at night when I wish I could be bouncing around to Sleater-Kinney & writing music.
I'm coming to the realization that all I was missing in my life was laughter. I had literally forgotten how to laugh. No matter how funny I thought something was, my laughs would be forced. An awkward and contrived replication of instinct. Portlandia fixed my problem. Now I laugh a lot.

I am the product of my own imagination. If I want to be happy all I have to do is close my eyes and imagine sunny days and Fred Armisen. I can keep Tegan and Sara on repeat for hours on end and remember waiting in line for 10 hours to see a screening of their new DVD Get Along. Sara Quin and her beautiful smile ten feet away from me.

I know better than anyone that life is just a collection, a flimsy string, of memories. Who you are is subjective upon which of those memories you choose to bring to the surface.

There is nothing I can't do. I'm writing music that is blowing me away. I'm preparing for a life on stage, a life of story telling. There is nothing that can get me down now that I feel this high.

No one can let you down until you give them the power to do so. And if someone turns out to be the big bad wolf, why give them that much credit? Enough credit to get you down.

May you have an infinite amount of tomorrows. May the beautiful ones give you stomach aches from laughing too much. May the dark ones lead you to create beauty out of the awfulness of it all.

I wish nothing but internal sunshine for every one.

The sun will be up soon, thats my cue to nod off into a Donnie Darko dreamland.

See you tomorrow with the moon.

Yaz